According to Hani Henry, chair and associate professor of psychology in the Department of Sociology, Anthropology, Psychology and Egyptology at AUC, Robert Sternberg’s psychological theory covers the most common reasons why we fall in love, namely: intimacy, passion and commitment.

Intimacy

A basic friendship is a relationship that involves a person falling in love with another person for intimate reasons. It lacks commitment and passion. Henry explained that intimacy isn’t just about developing a close bond with someone. "Sometimes it can be self-serving. Everyone needs to feel loved, cared for, and respected. Women need to feel their femininity while men desire their masculinity.

A perfect example of intimacy captured is Adele’s Hi. Adele calls her ex-boyfriend in the chorus and vents her pain about the relationship. She explains that many years have passed and she hasn’t done much healing. "Her lyrics are magical and speak for a lot of people who want to have an emotional connection with anyone or a short-term relationship," he said.

Passion

The normal thing to do is fall in love due to strong feelings or desire. Passionate love can be developed from feelings that result in sexual attraction, romance and physical interest. "When you see someone you like, you are captivated by something that draws you to that person," explained Henry. "The attraction is not just physical. There is also a fascination for the hair, eyes, body."

In the absence of intimacy and commitment, infatuation is developed with the person you love.
attitude status in hindi feel attracted and soon develop lust. Some people view a person as an object and become obsessed. He stated that it is possible to be together for years with someone and not feel a commonality.

Commitment

Commitment is complete love. "People who seek commitment want stability and a healthy relationship," he said. "People who are only looking for commitment might lack basic friendship interests and sexual attraction."

Henry says that young adults today are more interested in objects than in relationships. He said, "The objectification of culture comes from consumerism." "The more consumeristic a culture becomes, then the more people lose interest in commitments. Some youth are more interested in impressing people they don’t care about. Everything must be consumed, even relationships with other people.

Love Outside the Triangular Theory

Sternberg’s love theory can be understood by anyone. But we all have our own reasons for falling madly in love. "Your reason for falling in love doesn’t necessarily need to be explained by science. Henry stated that some personal needs could include the fear of being alone or social peer pressure, fulfillment, or religious values.

Psychology may have some things to say about love but the love we choose is what defines us. We have our own way of understanding what makes us happy and fulfills our human needs. "Some people are caught with a need that meets each dimension of the triangle and they can’t give up on two because of the different needs they get. Love can be complex.